Have you ever met a person that enjoys the rigmarole associated with an airport? I certainly haven’t. Nor am I one of them. I mean, don’t get me wrong… I love the long lines and the rude staff; I love waiting on an even longer line so an incompetent security guard can treat me like a criminal, complete with the cavity search; I love the flight delays, and layovers, and running to make a connection — ok, so I’m using the term “love” loosely. All of that, though heinous in its right, pales in comparison to the single most annoying aspect of flying. Of course, I’m referring to lost luggage. If you’ve ever felt even the slightest frustration with an airport, please, dear reader, read attentively as I recount the tale of “The Cursed Bag”.

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March 3, 2004 – Vancouver, BC

Hello boys and girls. That’s right, I’m back. So, a great deal has happened in the world since last we spoke. Where to begin? Where to begin?

Well, I suppose I’d be remiss not to mention something about the hurricane, right? I happened to see a Twilight Zone episode right around “landfall”, which is now our fun new buzzy catchy vocabulary word. The gift of a natural disaster. It drips proactive synergy.

Anyway, in this Twilight Zone there’s the threat, as there often is in the Twilight Zone, of nuclear war. The episode shows the effects of that threat in a particular suburban neighborhood. One man in this neighborhood has a bomb shelter. The other men don’t. Yet the other men love their families, want to protect them, want to live through the impending disaster. Why should the one man who has properly prepared for this moment be the only one to survive it? (I believe there is a similar episode of The Simpsons. Think Ned Flanders in the role of the man with the shelter)

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March 23, 2004 – Arches National Park, UT

We’ve all slept in many beds throughout our lives. These beds come in various levels of comfort. We’ve all experienced firm beds, soft beds, tall beds, short beds, beds that may as well be rocks, and beds that feel like lumpy oatmeal. Yes, there are all kinds of beds out there. And for those of you that lived in a dorm room, you will probably agree that those are the most uncomfortable beds in existence. Disagree if you wish, but in my opinion, a plastic mattress on a wooden bunk does not a bed make. As a result of that egregious bed experience, I set out to construct the perfect bed.

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In an effort to provide visitors with the most immersive experience possible, Fork and Salt Shaker is pleased to announce “Word of the Day” auto-linking. That’s right, whenever a “Word of the Day” is actually used in a post, clicking that word will bring you directly to its definition. To encourage readers to try out these delightful locutions, this linking will soon be extended to the comments section as well. So please, give them a try, love them, these words are your friends!!!

Definition: adj 1. able to be touched or felt. 2. (esp. of a feeling or atmosphere) so intense as to be almost touched or felt. 3. clear to the mind or plain to see

Usage: When Steve was taken from me, I experienced a palpable sense of loss.

March 8, 2004 – Olympic National Park, WA

Fork and Salt Shaker is pleased to announce that Rainbow over Central Park is currently featured on CentralPark.com. You can go directly to the photo by clicking here.

Note: Some people have reported that the links to take you directly to the photo do not always work correctly. If you come back to this site and click the link again, it should bring you to a page with the photo you see to the right of this text.

Please check it out, rate the photo highly (this is in the Shameless Self-Promotion category, after all), and enjoy some of the other features of this amazingly comprehensive site dedicated to the world’s most famous park.

About CentralPark.com:
CentralPark.com – The complete guide to the world’s most famous public space, with mapping tools, photos, event listings, history, news, shopping and more. Visit CentralPark.com.

Wondering where I found the time to get to all those national parks to take pictures? Well, after I wrote the “Haiku of the Short Timer”, I spent some time at the beach. After I tired of the beach, I embarked on a six-month roadtrip around the United States. This was such a stupendous trip, it required its very own website. Please have a look.

The Roadtrip

Note: Unfortunately, this wonderous undertaking required all of my money and all of my credt. Upon my return I needed to start working immediately. Really, I had nothing to my name, except debt…had plenty of debt. As such, the website remains slightly unfinished. I’ll get around to it eventually.